


Resolved

by absolutely_disgraceful



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-25
Updated: 2015-10-25
Packaged: 2018-04-28 00:09:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5070280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/absolutely_disgraceful/pseuds/absolutely_disgraceful
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thomas and Jimmy seem to finally have their happy ending, but with one more lingering issue to work through.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Resolved

They'd talked about sex extensively, long before they actually did it. After finally managing to get together, or rather, when Jimmy had finally managed to overcome some fears, they'd decided the best way to go about the whole relationship was slowly, and this was a major part of that. 

So they'd talked about everything, how many people they'd each been with, men and women (in Jimmy's case, that is) both, who those people had been, names and all (even though the other would never even know them), who preferred which position, what they'd do the first time and so on and so on. In case of being caught, Thomas decided that it would probably be best if it happened in his room-he'd already been in trouble once before for being in Jimmy's room uninvited, at least this way it would be apparent that Jimmy had come to him; not that it would matter all that much either way if they were caught, but it still mattered enough to Thomas.

So finally, after nearly six months of building up from chaste kisses and barely more than friendly touches, they were there-Thomas naked in his own bed, on his back, legs spread with an equally naked Jimmy thrusting between them, trying not to make too much suspicious noise. They got up to switch position (Thomas occasionally liked being taken from behind when he finished), and afterwards he was very glad that they did. 

As soon as Jimmy began manically whispering in his ear, "I can-I'm going to-!", and Thomas felt his own orgasm building as Jimmy’s warmth spread inside of him, the worst thing he could imagine happened; he began to cry. He was only happy that at least Jimmy wouldn't have a chance to notice until after they finished.  
Thomas collapsed, face first into his pillow, trying to stop his shoulders shaking, and get control over himself. What was the matter with him? 

At the same time, Jimmy removed himself from Thomas, and smiled boyishly while resting himself on Thomas' back. That was when he noticed, and his smile dropped in a moment as he sat up, and tried without success to get Thomas to look at him.

Immediately worried and a bit frightened, as loudly as he dared he exclaimed,"Oi! No-what's this?" and when there was no response but Thomas' continued sobbing he became very frightened, "I never hurt you did I?", unsure about whether or not he should take it upon himself to go back down there and look, but then within another moment becoming defensive about it and stating "Well for Christ's sake Thomas! If I was hurtin' ya, you might've said!".

And finally, Thomas managed to turn his blotchy, wet face and choke out a reply, "You never hurt me".

“What, then?”

“I dunno,” Thomas sat up, so that both of them were squeezed side by side on the narrow cot. “I guess I’m just feelin’ a bit overwhelmed. It’s been some time.” He sniffed and wiped his eyes. 

“Overwhelmed with what? This is what you wanted, isn’t it?” He was a little disconcerted with the way Jimmy said that, and with the look on his face; was there an underlying sneer there?

“It’s what you wanted too” he said quietly, looking at his hands while Jimmy continued to look at him questioningly with his nose slightly wrinkled “I know it’s been a few years, but it seems like we went from you hatin’ the sight of me to us being friends to lovers without resolving the past, or fast-an’ I don’t even know why that’d bother me. I’m sorry, I’m talking nonsense.”

“What d’you mean by ‘resolving the past’? Look at what just happened between us, is that not resolved enough for you?”

“I just-and I don’t know why-I just keep thinking about that whole year when you were bein’ nasty to me” Thomas said, sniffing back the aftermath of his tears.

Jimmy made that face where his mouth twisted up in irritation or anger, and he was about to respond angrily when Thomas cut in “an’ I’m not saying it wasn’t my fault. I know I made you uncomfortable, and I deserved for you to hate me and not want to be around me. But sometimes you were just-“ and his voice broke again, he looked away from Jimmy again and brought a hand up over his face, “so unkind to me”, he managed before his embarrassed sobs took his voice again.

That’s when Jimmy softened and sighing, he put his arms around Thomas to pull him so that his head was on Jimmy’s shoulder, their foreheads resting together.  
“I’m sorry, alright, for all of it” he said in a loud whisper, nuzzling Thomas’ forehead with the bridge of his nose while Thomas continued to sniff. “I guess I just never realized how badly I’d hurt you with all that”.

And it was true, it hadn’t been his intention to hurt Thomas with all his nastiness, not really. He’d more been trying to separate the two of them in the eyes of everyone else- if he made cruel jibes and treated Thomas with distain they’d all notice how normal he was, how unlike Thomas he was. The fact that his mean remarks and dirty looks were actually hurtful never really entered his mind.

Now Thomas was the one who got angry. He lifted his head and glared at Jimmy in disbelief. “You never realized you were hurtin’ me? Treatin’ me like a bloody leper whenever I came within an inch of ya, calling me a woman and all else in front of the others?”, his voice getting high, the way it did whenever he was upset.

“Yeah, I never thought of it like that” Jimmy responded calmly, sitting up from his slouch and looking at Thomas determinedly “I was being an arse and an idiot. I know it did hurt” he said earnestly, as Thomas looked like he was about to cut in, “but I want you to understand I weren’t thinking about it like that at the time. I was scared and confused about it all. The only way I could feel normal was by being nasty to you. I feel badly-more than badly, about it all now. I’m sorry, I’m changed now. I’ll not ever hurt you again; I want you to believe that.”

“I’m sorry too, about making you uncomfortable an’ all” said Thomas, wiping his eyes, and settling back into the same position Jimmy had pulled him into before. 

“Well no ones happier than me that it don’t make me uncomfortable anymore” Jimmy answered, smiling as Thomas looked up at him. 

“Alright. I think we’ve been a pair of soppy sods long enough for one evening. I promise next time’ll be more fun. I’m not actually the type of bloke to cry when he comes” and he finally brightened. 

“And who says there’ll be a next time?”

“You if you know what’s good for ya!” and he ripped the pillow out from under Jimmy, thwacking him over the head with it.


End file.
